The average human lies at least 1. 65 times a day. [2] X Research source
If the act of lying can lead to more benefits than negative consequences, then the act is justified in the liar’s mind. [5] X Trustworthy Source Greater Good Magazine Journal published by UC Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center, which uses scientific research to promote happier living Go to source
You might be a compulsive liar if you’re addicted to lying. Compulsive liars are unable to stop or break their bad habit. If your lies are inconsistent and don’t make any sense, then you may be a compulsive liar. You might be a pathological liar if you’re lying to boost your ego. Pathological liars use lies to increase their self-esteem or avoid blame. If your lies are serving some personal agenda, then you may fit the criteria of a pathological liar.
Lying also damages your relationship with yourself. Liars deal with a lot of guilt and shame as a result of their behavior.
Find someone you trust and disclose your lying habit to them. No matter how big or small you think your problem is, sharing them with a loved one can help you stay accountable. Don’t justify your dishonesty. Instead of making excuses for your past behavior, try to own up to your mistakes. This will help you recognize the severity of your problem and then work towards making a lasting change.
Trying to apologize face-to-face. While it can be uncomfortable to approach someone you’ve hurt in person, verbal apologies allow you to be more personal. If your circumstances don’t allow for a verbal apology, then try to take time to craft an apology in a letter, email, or even text that shows you accept responsibility and express remorse. Being sincere in your apology. Make sure to acknowledge that you were wrong and express your regret. Then, let the other person know that you’re learning from your mistakes and ask what you can do to repair the relationship. [11] X Research source Accepting other people’s reactions. Lies can be extremely damaging to relationships. This is why hearing the truth could cause someone to have a negative comment or reaction that you don’t like. Even if this is the case, try to remain calm and remind yourself that recovery takes time and that you’re doing the right thing by coming clean.
Who are the people compelling you to lie? Where are you? What are you trying to avoid?
Be thorough in your written accounts. Instead of just jotting down each lie, try to write down what may have caused you to lie, how the lie made you feel, and how you could avoid the situation in the future.
If you are faced with a trigger and find it too difficult to say the truth, try staying quiet or changing the subject to something you feel more comfortable talking about. This will allow you to disengage from the situation so you won’t lie. Be patient when trying to reduce your lies. If you’ve become a habitual liar, change takes time. Reassure yourself that you can do it!
Pathological lying can be a symptom of unresolved trauma or an underlying mental illness. [16] X Research source
