So why do so many Tinder dates suggest moving to Instagram? Is it weird to DM someone you know on Tinder using Instagram? And why is Instagram the app of choice, over, say, Facebook or Snapchat?
Why Do Matches Put Their Instagram on Tinder?
Instead of (or in addition to) a full profile, your Tinder match might link to their Instagram profile. Or after chatting for a little while, they may suggest switching to Instagram. Here are a few reasons why.
Your Match Wants to Get to Know You Better
Dating profiles contain limited information. Tinder, for instance, lets you add nine photos, and its About Me section limits you to 500 characters.
Instagram, meanwhile, specializes in photographs. You can upload numerous images per post and you can post as many times as you want (although if you add too many in a short period, Instagram might think you’re a spam account). That gives your match plenty of chances to get to know you. The real you.
While we all pick photos that make us look good, Instagram feels less curated than Tinder. Go on a profile and swipe along to tagged posts, and you’ll see pictures other people have uploaded too.
It’s a nice way of getting to know someone’s hobbies, friendship groups, and general attitude to life. This makes conversations and finding common ground easier—and potentially makes an in-person date likelier!
Matches Use Tinder to Get Instagram Followers
On the other hand, yes, some people use Tinder simply to grow their Instagram followings.
This can feel particularly hurtful if you’ve been chatting to your match for a day or so, then follow them on Instagram, only to then get ghosted.
Why do they want more followers on Instagram? The same reasons anyone does. Sometimes, it’s for self-satisfaction: who doesn’t get a swell of pride when they see an array of new followers? Sometimes, they do it because they aspire to be a model or an influencer.
And in most cases, they do it because it works. Some women in particular note that they can get up to 100 new followers in a single day, as GQ reports. It can be even more than that if they’re using a subscription plan like Tinder Plus, Gold, or Platinum.
Instagram and Tinder Can be Linked
Tinder profiles can be integrated with Instagram anyway, so encouraging a following via the dating app is especially convenient.
How do you link Tinder and Instagram? Just go to your profile, click Edit, then Connect Instagram.
Tinder even admitted that they did this so that you didn’t have to list your Instagram username in your About Me. That phenomenon came about because so many users were asking potential matches to link up elsewhere.
Fortunately, Tinder won’t post anything on Instagram, so don’t worry about your friends finding out you’re on Tinder.
Instagram Is Less Formal Than Other Social Media Apps
Sadly, there remains some stigma about using dating apps. Of course, not everyone feels that way: why should there be any embarrassment over trying to find love? Nonetheless, you might feel uneasy linking up with Tinder matches on another social media service.
Connecting with them on Facebook feels like a declaration of something more; you’re trying to get to know someone, not change your relationship status right away. All your family and friends are on Facebook, so matching up with too many people raises questions… and maybe expectations too.
Instagram is less formal: you can connect with any number of people without it feeling too serious. Lots of people use Instagram to simply follow some fun accounts. Still, using it feels more personal than, say, Twitter, which can lend a degree of anonymity.
You might match on Snapchat too, but because it’s primarily used to send self-destructing images, either party leaves themselves open to NSFW content (i.e. nudes), which probably won’t be appreciated.
Is It Weird to Message Someone From Tinder on Instagram?
With all those potential reasons in mind, you might be wondering if it’s weird to follow someone on Instagram after matching on Tinder. It’s not. It’s expected if they ask you to. If they list their Instagram or have connected it to Tinder, they might expect you to as well.
If you’re not sure, ask them. In most cases, it’s fine.
You can like some of their photos (only the most recent ones though; if you trawl back too far and like something from five years ago, you could come across as a creep). You could comment on a photo, although you should be aware that all their followers will be able to see that comment too. You risk crossing a line there and putting them off you straight away.
You might think that the next step is messaging them on Instagram. You can send a Direct Message (DM), but keep it light; don’t get too intense too quickly. Or you could wait for them to message you. This is a solid way to find out whether they’re really interested or simply want to grow their Instagram following.
If they prefer to stick to messaging on Tinder or want to communicate another way, do that instead. They might even give you their number if things are going particularly well.
How Soon Is Too Soon to Follow Someone on Instagram?
There’s no definitive answer to how soon you should follow someone on Instagram because it depends on numerous things.
Firstly, if they ask you to and you want to, do it. It would be odd if you wait ages after they ask you to follow them.
Think about the number of strangers you follow already. We’re sure you follow celebrities you’ve never met in real life. Equally, think about all the strangers who follow you. This, however, isn’t the same situation. But neither is it Facebook or LinkedIn, where most people only connect with those they know in real life or otherwise regularly converse with.
This situation is the middle ground. You’re following them because you like them, you like their content, and you want to get to know them better. It’s that simple.
Simple, that is, with caveats. You don’t want to follow them immediately after connecting with them. You’ll come across as too clingy or obsessive. You could leave it a few hours, a few days, or even a few dates. That’s right: some people don’t match up on Instagram until after they’ve been on a few dates.
It’s all up to you to judge your individual situation, but if your match lists their Instagram profile on Tinder, they won’t be too surprised when you start following them. They might even follow you back…
Tinder and Instagram: A Match Made in Heaven?
This is the scary world of dating, so you’re bound to overthink everything. But this isn’t a big deal. It’s only Instagram.
Some Tinder users are only on the app so they can gain Instagram followers. Others will suggest connecting on the photo-sharing platform because they want to get to know you better. So while you should be prepared in case your match is solely in it for the follows, be hopeful that linking up on another social media app is a positive sign.
